


The Shapeliest

by christinefromsherwood



Series: 007 Fest 2020 [14]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Bond and Q are neighbours, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Pre-Relationship, There's a fire alarm, at least an attempt at these, it's winter, reverse trope
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:20:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25223020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/christinefromsherwood/pseuds/christinefromsherwood
Summary: James had been back in the country for exactly two hours and asleep for 10 minutes when the alarm blared.they’ve found himHe was opening the window and climbing down the eaves with his holster in his teeth before he knew what he was doing.Then his feet touched the frost-tipped grass that he realised he was standing in front of his building in his boxer-briefs.In November.At one in the morning.And that it had been a fire alarm.
Relationships: James Bond/Q
Series: 007 Fest 2020 [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1809718
Comments: 35
Kudos: 128
Collections: 007 Fest Fancreations





	The Shapeliest

**Author's Note:**

  * For [MrKsan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrKsan/gifts).



> written for the Collab Prompt for Ksan who asked for: _Q and Bond are neighbors but never realized it. During a building fire alarm (real fire or not? You decide) the whole building is evacuated and they suddenly meet outside... With less then appropriate clothing; it’s winter and it’s freezing outside_
> 
> also written for Reverse Trope Day: you'll know which trope once you read it :)

James had been back in the country for exactly two hours and asleep for 10 minutes when his alarm blared. 

_they’ve found him_

He was opening the window and climbing down the eaves with his holster in his teeth before he knew what he was doing. 

Then his feet touched the frost-tipped grass and he realised he was standing in front of his building in his boxer-briefs. 

In November. 

At one in the morning. 

And that it had been a _fire_ alarm. 

And that Q’s prototype was back in his flat. 

Fuck.

Clumsily snaking his arms through the holster straps, James craned his neck upwards. His hands were shaking.

_climb back..._

“Double- _Bond_?!” came from behind and James was suddenly enveloped in a warm, familiar scent as a heavy coat dropped on his shoulders.

“Q?!” James heard his voice break on the word. Because suddenly, his _Quartermaster_ was there and he was shoving something warm and orange at James and then reaching out and rubbing his arms. 

The thing on his chest purred--James was holding _a cat_?!--and warmth began to spread from the tips of his ears to his entire face. He fought not to stumble as his muscles relaxed.

Q wasn’t wearing his glasses and his eyes looked very green. 

Suddenly Q stopped touching him and took a step back. 

“What are you doing here and why are you naked? Much as I enjoy your shapely behind, it _is_ below zero.” 

_what_

“What?” James said and then stupidly: “I live here.” Q in his thick sweater, trousers _and_ winter boots bent down to unzip a go bag. 

Q had a go bag. And a cat. One warm cat.

_not two?_

“Huh. You do?” Q hummed, pulling out a pair of thick socks. “I wonder why Moneypants never told me we were neighbours. Here.”

And then James was suddenly sitting on the bench in front of his building, in his Quartermaster’s coat, _no longer_ holding his Quartermaster’s one warm cat, but instead a pair of fuzzy, green socks?!

It was the green socks that joggled his exhausted brain.

“ _Shapely_ -?!” He was interrupted by the crackling of a tannoy. There was apparently a group of hastily-dressed people gathered a few feet from the main door.

“Attention, residents of number 11, it was a false alarm. You may return to your flats. I repeat, a false alarm. It appears Mrs. Parker’s bellend son _mistook_ our third floor fire alarm for a light-switch.”

James had no idea who these people were. The angry, shouting lady had to be Mrs. Parker, though.

“Guess you won’t be needing those socks.” Q grinned at him, and- 

_shapely behind_

Q liked his arse. Q’s coat smelled like Earl Grey tea and vanilla ice cream. Q’s grin widened and he added: 

“Still, would you like to come in for a cup of tea to... _warm you up_?” 

Scrunching his eyebrows, James opened his mouth. And he closed it again. And then to his eternal shame, he _swooned_. 

The cat meowed unhappily as Q caught him, his grin disappearing in an instant. 

“Oh fuck, I’m an idiot. You’ve hardly slept! Come on.” And then James suddenly had Q’s hand on the small of his back, burning through the fabric of the coat, as he guided James up the steps into the building and then further up the stairs to the wrong door on the wrong floor. 

“I don’t live _here_ ,” was what came out of his mouth. Q chuckled; the cat meowed. 

“I know, James,” he said softly, unlocking the wrong door. “I want to keep an eye on you tonight. You’re really out of it.” 

James moved through the door like in a dream. His mind barely making sense of a cat tree, outlines of massive, darkened screens... Then suddenly, he was falling into warm, rumpled sheets, tugging Q’s warm, vanilla-tea coat around him. 

“James? Do you- Oh! Well, goodnight then.” Q’s laughter fell like a soft summer rain. James sighed. And he liked James’ arse. 

James smiled, half-asleep.

“The shapeliest,” he mumbled and then he knew no more.


End file.
